Hey man sorry I got all grabby
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
