how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
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