Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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