Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
