I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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