Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
