I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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