i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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