hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
