It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
