Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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