so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
