Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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