I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
