god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
