she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
don't judge my taste in strippers
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Randomize
