we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
