I just made out with a guy for $7.
this just has baby written all over it
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
So. Much. Porn.
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