Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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