I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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