Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Randomize
