So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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