I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
