in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
