She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I look better un-naked...
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
