I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
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