Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
