I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
How many fucks given?
0.12846
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Randomize
