She's JV to your varsity
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.�
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
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