Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Randomize
