Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
i barfeds in our rink
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize
