tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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