Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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