she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
