So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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