that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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