he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
