That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
