I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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