At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Randomize
