Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
