I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
