TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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