I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
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