Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Randomize