i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
