I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Randomize
