I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
