you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
