Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Randomize
